I never was a stay at home wife. The first time I was not working out of the home is when I had a one year old. I then had to learn about being a full time homemaker plus a full time mom. Since my mother had always worked, I didn’t have any clue about real housekeeping or homemaking. What little I have learned has been through the school of hard knocks.
There is a young lady that I know who has been married a little over a year. She gave up her teaching position shortly after marrying to be home. While many people today would say that is such a waste and may even accuse her of being lazy, I think it was a very wise decision.
See they knew that if and when the Lord decides to bless them with children that she, of course, would stay home with them and do all she could to raise them according to the Scriptures. Since she is home now before children, she has the opportunity to develop her homemaking skills. She can work on menu planning, house cleaning and time organization before children are added to the equation. Also, she can spend time serving her husband before her attention is divided between home, children and husband.
Another benefit to her not working outside of the home is that she can learn to budget accordingly and they will have already been accustomed to living off of one income. So many families have developed habits when having two incomes that are hard to change once a wife is home with the children. Habits such as fast food, instant meals (more expensive), paying others to do what they could do (lawn care, home maintenance, etc) and entertainment expenses.
Just this weekend I read a post by Mrs. Parunak about Going Crazy and Wanting to Go Back to Work? I had never thought of the combination of how becoming a first time mom and ending your out of the home work can combine with all the other stress and hormones to literally drive some women to want to work outside the home.
She was going crazy, and she wanted to go back to work.
And who could blame her, really? She had gone from being an independent woman, who got in the car in the morning, drove herself to her job, solved problems all day, and drove herself home by way of a few errands, to being a woman who needed to ask for help just to be able to take a shower. She had gone from interacting with people all day long, talking, smiling, sharing ideas, to a sudden, crushing solitude, with long, quiet hours ticking slowly by and nobody to talk to. She had gone from a world of deadlines and challenges, evaluations and praise, to a world where it hardly seemed to matter to much of anyone what she did or how she did it, and worst of all, she wasn’t entirely sure if she was good at what she did even though everyone seemed to think her life was easy. What had happened? She’d had a baby and quit her job to stay home. …
This is something that we should seriously think about and prepare ourselves or our children for. Just as we would hopefully prepare our daughters to cook meals and clean, we should prepare them for adjusting to being home and caring for a baby. I would venture to say that most stay at home mothers missed the stay at home wife stage of life.
We have been made to run full steam before we ever learned to walk.
Is it any wonder that many women choose to return to work?